We of the Ainsworth house do have interests besides debating theology and posting ironic pictures of Rambo’s gun sprouting roses. For example, I wouldn’t put it past us to stage a theological debate about the irony of Rambo’s gun sprouting roses.
But seriously, for some lighter reading, check out “Stuff White People Like,” the newest addition to the blogroll and a hilarious compilation of stereotypes that hit painfully close to home. For a sample taste, read this post on “Gentrification“:
In general, white people love situations where they can’t lose. While this does account for the majority of their situations, perhaps the safest bet a white person can make is to buy a house in an up-and-coming neighborhood.
White people like to live in these neighborhoods because they get credibility and respect from other white people for living in a more “authentic” neighborhood where they are exposed to “true culture” every day. So whenever their friends mention their home in the suburbs or richer urban area, these people can say “oh, it’s so boring out there, so fake. In our neighborhood, things are just more real.” This superiority is important as white people jockey for position in their circle of friends.
They are like a modern day Lewis and Clark, except instead of searching for the ocean, they are searching for old properties to renovate.
In a few years, if more white people start moving in, these initial trailblazers will sell their property for triple what they paid and move into an ultramodern home.
Credibility or money, they can’t lose!
When one of these white people tell you where they live, you should say “whoa, it’s pretty rough down there. I don’t think I could live there.” This will make them feel even better about their credibility and status as neighborhood pioneers.
The reason I say this hits painfully close to home is that the house Josh, Jesse, Luis, and I moved into is situated in a neighborhood that up until quite recently was considered “the ‘hood.”
While we envisioned being surrounded by pushers, pimps, and prostitutes, we found we had chosen a once-dangerous neighborhood that is now just safe enough to be peppered with white hipsters who had the same idea as us: cheap rent + livin’ in da hood = authenticity. (And there’s nothing white people covet more than authenticity…in fact, that’s on the website, too).
John- that ish is hillarious. That bit about gentrification nails us. but don’t worry remember what our neighbor Tiny says, “I don’t care how many white people move here, this will always be the hood.” So we are in the hood no matter what.
You guys are so white! Ha ha..
That site is a kick in the pants!
Oh don’t worry, Katie, you’re all over that site, too. See Post #40: “Apple Products.”
http://stuffwhitepeoplelike.wordpress.com/2008/01/30/39-apple-products/
After reading that one, I’m a little disappointed, in traditional white person fashion, that I didn’t get an Apple sticker with mine. Kinda feels like they’ve robbed me of my chance to show my creativity of the world.
Dog’s, Vintage, Art degrees.. I’ll admit it. This guy has me pegged!
ugh…i never guessed i was so white.
i gotta go out and buy some reggaeton cd’s.
and a giant Puerto Rican flag.
thats for sure, man